I Don't Want to Die
by Whisper from the Shadows
Summary: Robin found someone besides Raven in the depths of Hell, and that someone doesn't want to die again.  Slightly dark RaeRob.


Title: I don't want to die... again  
Pairing: Rae/Rob  
Description: Robin found someone besides Raven in the depths of Hell, and that someone doesn't want to die again.  
Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans, if I did, I would be rich and my stories would be on TV rather than here.

He was staring at the bay, he always stared at the bay when he had something on his mind, it was almost guaranteed that if he was staring at the bay, he was thinking about something that was troubling him. Everyone else had finally given up on the celebrations, and almost everyone was already asleep, leaving him to his own devices.

The quiet, he enjoyed the quiet, no distractions while he allowed his mind to roam. Tonight was special though, it hadn't been but a few hours ago and he was walking through Hell itself, looking for a teammate... no a friend... no his **best** friend. And he'd found her, he'd walked side by side with his worst enemy into the depths of Hell for his best friend, and he walked out under his own power.

Not many people can say they've been to Hell, let alone walked in willingly, fought their way to one of the darker corners, and then brought someone back with them when they returned. He thought to himself that he should be happy, he saved his friends, who were now his family, and the world with that little "walk in the park". But there was something bothering him, when he walked back out, carrying the younger Raven, he felt like someone else came back. Someone that Robin had thought died many years ago, but he was alive, clear as the stars from the roof where the wind stirred his dark hair.

"A penny for your thoughts?" He almost started at the noise, but he knew it was going to happen. Her facial expression never changing, she added, "Can't bottle things up, Robin. You'll blow up the world if you do." That caught him off-guard, she didn't _do_ humor.

"Raven?" He was asking permission to speak, even knowing she was there to listen he had to ask. Sensing her unspoken nod he continued, "I know someone, they died." He could almost feel her breathing hitch a little, "They died a long time ago," her breathing steadied, realizing he wasn't talking about her right now, as she moved to stand beside him, "it's funny, I thought he was dead, no I knew he was dead, and never thought I would hear from him again." Curiosity was apparent in the air, but never once showing on her smooth face, "Then, when I went to find you, he found me."

Robin had stopped to find the right words when she spoke again, "We all thought he was dead, no one can survive falling into molten lava."

A small laugh stopped her from continuing, apparently he wasn't talking about Slade. The possibilities ran through her mind at unbelievable speeds before he spoke again, "No, I mean, yeah he died. But I knew he'd be back, even if he had to stab a few Demons in the back on the road, I knew Slade would be back." She didn't disagree with him wholly, but decided to let him finish his thoughts. "No, the person I am talking about died when he was eight. I watched him die, he was murdered right there along side those he loved."

He wasn't making any sense to her, "Robin?" the worry was evident in her voice, "Are you feeling okay? I don't want to question you, but I didn't see anyone else come out with us."

The corner of his mouth turned up a little, "No, I guess you wouldn't have. He was hiding." It was everything she could do not to take him to the infirmary and run a few scans for more psychological agents in his system, "He was hiding in plain sight the whole time, I thought he'd died, I saw him die, but I was wrong, he never died. He just hid, hid out in the open, the last place anybody would look for him." A chuckle forced her to face the man standing next to her, and the grin, it was the same grin he had when Cyborg or Beastboy got him with a good practical joke (while rare, it did happen), it was accepting and self-accusatory all mixed into one, had he finally gone mad?

"Robin? Who are you talking about?" There were no attempts to hide her emotions now, she was afraid her savior had lost his sanity in saving her. "Who did you think you saw die? Who's been hiding in plain sight? Where have they been hiding? Wh..." Her voice trailed off, when he put a finger to his lips. He apparently wasn't done.

"He's been hiding right in front of everybody, just a piece of cloth hiding him from the world." He could tell that she wasn't buying what he was selling, so he turned away. "He doesn't want to be dead anymore."

More control over her voice returning, but shaken to her very core she asked, "I thought he was hiding Robin? You're not making any sense, just tell me what you are talking about."

Robin's face fell to his hands, and Raven placed one on his shoulder. She could feel the pain, the confusion, and the... freedom as he lifted his head and balled his fists at his side. "I don't want to die again." His voice was different, it wasn't Robin, the leader of the Teen Titans, she didn't know what to think.

"Robin, you haven't died. So how could you die again?" Every fiber of her being was telling her that it would be a cold day in Hell before she let him die even once, let alone again.

"I'm not Robin." She was about to forcefully take him to the medical lab, when he reached behind his back, between them, and opened his white knuckled fist. "That is Robin, I've been hiding, playing dead. I'd even convinced myself that I wanted it to be that way. For a while, I even think I convinced myself that I'd died there with my parents."

She was trying to wrap her mind around the piece of cloth as he gripped it again and began walking towards the edge, and away from her. Out of instinct her hold on his shoulder tightened, and unlike Robin, it gave, and he turned to face her. For a passing moment, she thought she'd stopped time by accident again. "Robin..."

His cool blue eyes locked with her amethyst ones at the mention of his name. Holding out his hand he said, "Robin is right here." She glanced down just to confirm what he was talking about. "I'm not Robin right now, I'm borrowing his clothes, but Robin is right here." He held his hand out a little farther, to emphasize his point. "before I hid, people called me Dick. I died once, I lost my entire world when my parents died, and there was nothing I could do about it. So I willed myself away, I hid behind that flimsy piece of cloth." It was as if reliving those memories were a physical strain, his head dipped, and his knees almost buckled. Raven went to catch him, but he quickly got his footing and held her at bay, "Then, today I watched my entire world walk away with my worst enemy. And I knew, I couldn't hide this time. I couldn't let myself die again, so I came out of hiding. I was given a second chance, and I'm going to take it." His eyes met hers again, this time not demanding anything, but rather pleading with her, "Raven, you are my entire world. Don't let me die again, I'm tired of hiding."

The depths of his words began to sink in, she was speaking with Robin, but Robin without the mask. She wanted to make sure he was still sane, and knew only one question that would get an honest answer, "So, am I talking to Robin?"

She watched as the corners of his mouth curled up a little, "Semantics, I am Robin. I am Richard 'Dick' Grayson. And I just went through Hell to get my world back. If I loose that because of semantics, I'm going to die." He took a step towards her, "And I don't want to die again."

Mirroring his movement, she placed herself within inches of him. Slowly, as if he was making sure she wouldn't disappear, he wrapped his arms around her delicate, but powerful, frame. As he pulled her close her arms found their place around his waist and he heard her say, "I don't want you to die again."


End file.
